You’re seeing this page because, for one reason or another, you’ve expressed interest in buying me something.

First of all, thank you!

This page is meant to help reduce the agony of buying gifts. I’m not a terribly difficult person to shop for—you’ll see why in a second—but this should make it dead-ass simple (if not a little boring).

Here are my gift preferences in order of priority:

  1. Don’t buy me anything. Unless you’re inescapably required to buy me something—gift exchange, etc.—please feel free to totally forgo the gift. Buy me a drink next time we’re together.
  2. Make a donation in my name to your favorite charity. If you don’t have a favorite, I’m partial to the Wounded Warrior Project.
  3. Buy me a book. If you have a favorite book (or just one you really love), I’d love to read it. If not, you can choose from this gigantic list of books I’d like to read.
  4. Buy me a bottle of whiskey. Whatever looks interesting and fits within your budget. My only request is that it not be flavored (sorry, Fireball lovers).
  5. Buy me a cigar. Again, anything that looks interesting (and, unflavored please).

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